Entertainment
The Most Disturbing CSI Episode Is Pure Nightmare Fuel
By Jonathan Klotz
| Published
For 15 years, CSI reigned on CBS as one of the highest-rated shows after perfecting the procedural formula. Every now and then, the series broke its formula, from “Lab Rats” focusing on the side characters to “4×10” telling a series of short stories, but none shattered viewer expectations quite like Season 11’s “Sqweegel.” The night-shift team was trying to figure out the motives and identity behind the gimp-suit-clad serial killer, leading to the most unexpected ending of the entire series: They failed.
The Bad Guy Wins
Every now and then, there’s an episode of CSI where the villain’s triumphant, going back to Season 1 that occur din “Chimera,” except the doctor with twisted DNA eventually was brought to justice in a later episode. Sqweegel, named after the noise a little girl heard in a carwash, is never arrested, his identity is never uncovered, and he’s never seen again. When the episode starts, viewers know something is off about what they are about to see by the way the killer moves through a posh, upscale Las Vegas home. Slipping in through a window is one thing, but the way he walks up the stairs in a strange, herky-jerky motion that’s also inhumanly smooth and fluid is immediately unsettling.
The team, led during this era by Catherine Willows (Marg Helgenberger) and Dr. Raymond Langston (Laurence Fishburne), starts piecing together Sqweegel’s motive when they realize each victim was a hypocrite. The first was a disability-rights advocate who killed her son, but she admitted what she did and was allowed to live. Of the rest of the victims, a firefighter who starts fires to be a hero, and a cheating wife who serves on the Family Values Committee. As far as motives go, it’s par for the course for the procedural. It’s also the only part of the episode that’s normal.
The visual of Sqweegel stalking his victims and slipping into spaces too small and tight for a normal human is somehow more disturbing than the usual dead bodies. Sqweegel’s final shot, lacing up the gimp suit and saying, “I am no one,” is more dark and more haunting than you’d expect from a network show. After the episode first aired in 2010, CBS didn’t outright ban it; instead, the network quietly pulled it from the regular rotation, but it’s available today wherever CSI is streaming.
A Killer From A Different Series
“Sqweegel” felt like an episode from another series dropped into CSI. That’s essentially what it was. Series creator Anthony E. Zuiker wrote a series of novels alongside Duane Swierczynki called Level 26, which featured Sqweegel as the villain. The episode’s release date coincided with the release of Level 26: Dark Prophecy. Disturbingly, Sqweegel in the book was even darker and more disturbing than what was shown on network television.
The character was brought to life by Daniel Browning Smith, a talented contortionist, who also co-hosted Stan Lee’s Superhumans. Smith has hypermobile Ehlers–Danlos syndrome, which allows him a superhuman degree of flexibility. On the one hand, knowing that a real human was performing Sqweegel’s stunts and they weren’t special effects may make them worse, but on the other hand, Daniel Browning Smith also performs comedy and hasn’t killed anyone.
Corporate synergy is the real horror of CSI’s most disturbing episode. Because Sqweegel wasn’t created for the series, there was never going to be a resolution. Instead, he managed to kill, traumatize a child, and get away into the night, not because he was a criminal mastermind, but because of corporate licensing. Millions of fans were left wondering when he’d return, never realizing that they’d only learn his fate if they took a look, because it’s in a book.
Entertainment
Chuck Norris' Insane, R-Rated 80s Action Flick Is Exploitative, Violent, And Awesome
By Robert Scucci
| Published
1985’s Invasion U.S.A. Holy crap, what a movie. Chuck Norris doesn’t kill terrorists. Terrorists kill themselves when they learn that Chuck Norris is coming for them. This movie was made possible by Cannon Films, the studio that also brought us 1987’s Masters of the Universe and 1989’s Cyborg. The latter was famously written in a single weekend by Albert Pyun after Masters of the Universe underperformed, its sequel plans fell apart, and Cannon needed to repurpose expensive sets and props in a last-ditch effort to recoup their losses.
In case you’re wondering what caliber film Invasion U.S.A. is, the above paragraph is all the explanation you need. It was written by Chuck Norris and James Bruner, and directed by Joseph Zito, best known for classic punishers like 1979’s Bloodrage, 1984’s Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter, and 1984’s Missing in Action, another powerhouse Chuck Norris vehicle that sits with a 19 percent critical score on Rotten Tomatoes but is revered as a cult classic.
One Lone Badass Against Every Single Terrorist
Chuck Norris is retired CIA Agent Matt Hunter in Invasion U.S.A., and before things truly heat up, he’s totally fine with his quiet life. He rides around on his airboat with his best friend John Eagle (Dehl Berti), wrestles alligators, and rocks a full Canadian tuxedo like it’s standard issue. What Matt Hunter doesn’t know yet is that he’s about to be forced out of retirement when he learns that his old rival Mikhail Rostov (Richard Lynch) is back to his old tricks.
And what are Mikhail Rostov’s old tricks, you ask? It’s a bit convoluted, but here’s what I picked up after watching Invasion U.S.A., not knowing what I was getting into. Rostov, a Soviet terrorist, wants to create civil unrest in the United States. He first leaves his mark by posing as the Coast Guard and murdering a group of Cuban refugees. He then walks into a flop house, shoots a random dude in the dick, and throws a cocaine-addicted woman through a window.
By themselves, these sequences are unintentionally hilarious, but they also establish exactly what kind of menace Rostov is. These incidents are just the tip of the iceberg, because what he plans next is total anarchy. Rostov, haunted by nightmares of Matt Hunter finally delivering brutal justice, decides to assassinate him so he can finally stop looking over his shoulder. He screws it up, misses his target, blows up Hunter’s swamp house, and kills John Eagle in the process. That’s enough to bring Hunter out of retirement so he can make Rostov’s nightmare come true after all.
Rostov and his goons, thinking they’ve eliminated Matt Hunter, show up in suburban neighborhoods with bazookas and start blowing up random houses. They hit a mall with enough explosives to blow the Santa display into the stratosphere. They show up at public spaces and mow down people coming out of church. All of these acts of terror build toward race wars and full societal collapse. Chuck Norris drives around in his truck wearing driving gloves, because he needs to keep his hands fresh for combat.
More Collateral Damage Than You Could Ever Reasonably Count
Everything explodes in Invasion U.S.A. There is a very clear bad guy and good guy here, and Rostov has a very specific, very insane calling card. He shoots multiple people in the crotch as if it’s his signature move. He literally pulls down the waistband, inserts the muzzle, and starts blasting. Right in the family jewels. He does this a lot. It’s a perfect action movie if these are the kinds of thrills you seek. As Matt Hunter gets further into his crusade for justice, he stays stoic, confident, and ready to tell the higher-ups exactly what they need to do to make sure America rebuilds and remains a dominant world power.
It’s all so stupid, but it’s such a great flick to throw on with friends. The rewind-and-laugh-your-ass-off value on this one is off the charts, making it perfect for a group setting. If you want to celebrate one of Cannon’s most insane clunkers from the 80s, you can stream Invasion U.S.A. for free on Tubi as of this writing.
Entertainment
How to watch Atletico Madrid vs. Real Sociedad in the Copa del Rey final online for free
TL;DR: Live stream Atletico Madrid vs. Real Sociedad in the Copa del Rey final for free on ITVX. Access this free streaming platform from anywhere in the world with ExpressVPN.
Atletico Madrid are fresh from beating Barcelona in the quarter-final stage of the Champions League. They’re going to come up against Arsenal in the next round, but first they face off against Real Sociedad in the final of the Copa del Rey.
Atletico Madrid are comfortably above their opponents in La Liga, but Real Sociedad possess the quality to beat any side on their best day. The likes of Mendez and Oyarzabal will likely cause problems for Diego Simeone’s team this weekend.
If you want to watch Atletico Madrid vs. Real Sociedad in the Copa del Rey final from anywhere in the world, we have all the information you need.
When is Atletico Madrid vs. Real Sociedad?
Atletico Madrid vs. Real Sociedad in the Copa del Rey final kicks off at 3 p.m. ET on April 18. This fixture takes place at the Estadio de La Cartuja.
Mashable Top Stories
How to watch Atletico Madrid vs. Real Sociedad for free
Atletico Madrid vs. Real Sociedad in the Copa del Rey final is available to live stream for free on ITVX.
ITVX is geo-restricted to the UK, but anyone can access this free streaming platform with a VPN. These tools can hide your real IP address (digital location) and connect you to a secure server in the UK, meaning you can unblock ITVX to live stream the Copa del Rey for free from anywhere in the world.
Live stream Atletico Madrid vs. Real Sociedad in the Copa del Rey for free by following these simple steps:
-
Subscribe to a streaming-friendly VPN (like ExpressVPN)
-
Download the app to your device of choice (the best VPNs have apps for Windows, Mac, iOS, Android, Linux, and more)
-
Open up the app and connect to a server in the UK
-
Visit ITVX
-
Watch Atletico Madrid vs. Real Sociedad for free from anywhere in the world
$12.95 only at ExpressVPN (with money-back guarantee)
The best VPNs for streaming are not free, but most do offer free-trials or money-back guarantees. By leveraging these offers, you can access free live streams of the Copa del Rey without actually spending anything. This obviously isn’t a long-term solution, but it does give you enough time to stream Atletico Madrid vs. Real Sociedad in the Copa del Rey final before recovering your investment.
What is the best VPN for ITVX?
ExpressVPN is the best choice for bypassing geo-restrictions to stream live sport on ITVX, for a number of reasons:
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Servers in 105 countries including the UK
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Easy-to-use app available on all major devices including iPhone, Android, Windows, Mac, and more
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Strict no-logging policy so your data is secure
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Fast connection speeds free from throttling
-
Up to 10 simultaneous connections
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30-day money-back guarantee
A two-year subscription to ExpressVPN is on sale for $68.40 and includes an extra four months for free — 81% off for a limited time. This plan includes a year of free unlimited cloud backup and a generous 30-day money-back guarantee. Alternatively, you can get a one-month plan for just $12.99 (with money-back guarantee).
Live stream Atletico Madrid vs. Real Sociedad in the Copa del Rey final for free with ExpressVPN.
Entertainment
How to watch Verona vs. AC Milan online for free
TL;DR: Live stream Verona vs. AC Milan in Serie A for free on BBC iPlayer. Access this free live stream from anywhere in the world with ExpressVPN.
Serie A showcases a number of interesting matchups this weekend, including Verona vs. AC Milan. These teams are at either end of the table, so most fans will be expecting a comfortable victory for the visitors. There’s always the possibility that the slim chance of survival will drive Verona on to do something special at the Marcantonio Bentegodi.
If you want to watch Verona vs. AC Milan in Serie A for free from anywhere in the world, we have all the information you need.
When is Verona vs. AC Milan?
Verona vs. AC Milan in Serie A kicks off at 9 a.m. ET on April 19. This fixture takes place at the Marcantonio Bentegodi.
How to watch Verona vs. AC Milan for free
Verona vs. AC Milan in Serie A is available to live stream for free on BBC iPlayer.
Mashable Top Stories
BBC iPlayer is geo-restricted to the UK, but anyone can access this free streaming platform with a VPN. These handy tools can hide your real IP address (digital location) and connect you to a secure server in the UK, meaning you can unblock BBC iPlayer from anywhere in the world.
Live stream Verona vs. AC Milan for free by following these simple steps:
-
Subscribe to a streaming-friendly VPN (like ExpressVPN)
-
Download the app to your device of choice (the best VPNs have apps for Windows, Mac, iOS, Android, Linux, and more)
-
Open up the app and connect to a server in the UK
-
Visit BBC iPlayer
-
Live stream Verona vs. AC Milan for free from anywhere in the world
$12.95 only at ExpressVPN (with money-back guarantee)
The best VPNs for streaming are not free, but most do offer free-trials or money-back guarantees. By leveraging these offers, you can watch Verona vs. AC Milan without committing with your cash. This isn’t a long-term solution, but it does give you enough time to live stream select fixtures from Serie A before recovering your investment.
What is the best VPN for BBC iPlayer?
ExpressVPN is the best choice for bypassing geo-restrictions to stream live sport on BBC iPlayer, for a number of reasons:
-
Servers in 105 countries including the UK
-
Easy-to-use app available on all major devices including iPhone, Android, Windows, Mac, and more
-
Strict no-logging policy so your data is secure
-
Fast connection speeds free from throttling
-
Up to 10 simultaneous connections
-
30-day money-back guarantee
A two-year subscription to ExpressVPN is on sale for $68.40 and includes an extra four months for free — 81% off for a limited time. This plan includes a year of free unlimited cloud backup and a generous 30-day money-back guarantee. Alternatively, you can get a one-month plan for just $12.99 (with money-back guarantee).
Live stream Verona vs. AC Milan in Serie A for free with ExpressVPN.
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