Entertainment
New Starfleet Academy Episode Takes One Small Step Forward, Then Totally Destroys Star Trek
By Chris Snellgrove
| Published
Starfleet Academy has been steadily improving as a show, and the latest episode showcases some of that improvement with a fairly compelling Klingon storyline. Unfortunately, the quality of this tale is undermined by the show’s weird penchant for vulgarity and its bizarre destruction of one of the franchise’s most iconic planets. The result is an episode that Charles Dickens (one of Captain Kirk’s favorite authors) might have summed up, “It was the best of Trek, it was the worst of Trek.”
The worst part of this episode (and beware major spoilers from here on, space cadets!) is the revelation that the Klingon homeworld and most of their empire have been destroyed because the Burn made their dilithium reactors blow up. There is so much wrong with this: the Burn doesn’t magically cause dilithium to explode (it only blew up starships because dilithium going inert caused warp core breaches), and it’s bizarre the Klingons would use dilithium as a power source in the first place when rival empires like the Federation figured out how to power planets with fusion nearly a millennium ago.
It Was Not A Good Day To Die
This plot point gets even stupider when you consider that dilithium was becoming really scarce in the galaxy about 15-20 years before the Burn, so aliens (even ones as dumb as the Klingons) relying on it to power every planet in their empire would have switched to an alternative power source long before the Burn somehow blew every planet to smithereens. Like, the Klingons of this show were willing to embrace a triple parent model to save their race; are these writers really suggesting they wouldn’t have simply switched power sources, given that they had up to two decades of warning that dilithium wasn’t sustainable?
On a narrative level, it’s also depressing that Star Trek’s writers felt the need to destroy Qo’noS, one of the most iconic planets in the entire franchise. In this Starfleet Academy episode, the primary reason to do this is seemingly to give a tragic backstory to Jay-Den, the show’s sensitive, pacifist Klingon. This is Trek’s third trip to this well (after giving tragic backstory to Spock by destroying Vulcan and to Picard by destroying Romulus), and I’m getting pretty sick of writers who can’t motivate their characters through anything less than destroying billions of lives and forever altering franchise history.
If you’re a Klingon fan, this plot point is that much more horrifying because these aliens believe that the only way they can get into their version of heaven is to die in battle. Now, we know that the vast majority of them died without a weapon in their hands, meaning that they all went to Klingon hell. Doing this to the franchise’s most famous aliens for any reason would have been downright weird, but doing it just to make the new softboy Klingon seem interesting is downright insulting.
The Dirty Talking Doctor Returns
On an even stupider note, Voyager’s Doctor (the same one who was cracking poop jokes in the first episode) uses the phrase “Speech and debate is not for the chickensh*t;” when a cadet asks if he can talk like that, the cranky hologram cites the privilege of his age and how he has earned the right to talk however he wants to.
That’s a fine sentiment (signed, a professor who sometimes curses in class), but “chicken” has never, ever been used in Star Trek as a synonym for “coward.” So even if we accept that characters in the 32nd century are still using the word “sh*t” (which has been used in the real world for over a thousand years), it’s weird that the Doctor would pair it with “chicken” in a way that was completely at least one century (and quite possibly many centuries) before he was even programmed.
Not That There’s Anything Wrong With That!
The final major problem with this episode is how it hints that Jay-Den, the sensitive Klingon featured in this episode, may be gay. Now, there’s obviously nothing wrong with having a gay character, and a gay Klingon (something we’ve literally never seen before) could provide plenty of narrative opportunities for talented writers to explore.
But as several fans have pointed out on social media, this Klingon is an aspiring healer, so the show is seemingly embracing the “gay male nurse/gay male doctor” stereotype that is very prevalent in modern culture. This is a harmful stereotype that has led to bullying of real-life men in healthcare, and it’s a little weird to see a progressive Star Trek show set in the 32nd century embracing a weird, retrograde stereotype of the 21st century.
Of course, the franchise did the exact same thing with Culber, the gay doctor that Discovery killed off in Season 1. He was resurrected, but his name on Starfleet Academy’s weird memorial wall implies that he somehow died again offscreen. Considering how wholeheartedly Star Trek has embraced the problematic “killing your gays” trope, I can only hope Jay-Den survives his apparent sexual awakening!
Age Gap Discourse Is Without Honor
If you can get past the aforementioned problems, there are some interesting things to enjoy about the latest episode of Starfleet Academy. Holly Hunter’s centuries-old chancellor finally stops spinning in her chair long enough to hook up with her Klingon ex, and (in what feels like a fun throwback to The Original Series) their continued sexual chemistry may be the key to saving the Klingons. You see, the Federation has discovered a replacement for their lost homeworld, but these stubborn aliens would rather die out than receive charity.
Knowing this warrior race as well as she does, the chancellor arranges a kind of mock battle between Starfleet and the Klingons so the latter can feel like they have conquered the world. The whole plot feels like a fun homage to “A Matter of Honor,” the Next Generation episode where Riker learned that assuaging Klingon pride is often a matter of letting them think they’ve won. This episode also deserves credit for a realistic teacher moment in which the chancellor promptly lets Jay-Den think the mock fight between empires was his idea, which boosts his confidence as a student and gets him some brownie points with the Klingons.
A few more things worth mentioning: while the whole “murder most of these aliens and send them straight to hell” plot remains wildly offensive, this Starfleet Academy episode has some interesting insights into Klingon psychology. Plus, the burgeoning friendship between Caleb and Jay-Den is much more effective than I ever imagined, echoing interactions between fan-favorite pairings like Nog and Jake or Tendi and Rutherford.
Time To Activate Your TV’s Cloaking Device
It was also fun to see Starfleet cadets nerding out over honing their debate skills. Oh, and in a “it had to happen eventually” moment, the show’s half-Klingon, half-Jem-hadar master of cadets gets to offer some solid advice to someone rather than just stand around cartoonishly screaming. Unfortunately, this episode sandwiches its better parts between so much offensive, canon-destroying bullsh*t that it’s tough to even see (much less appreciate) what works well.
Last week, I gently praised Starfleet Academy for its snobs vs. slobs prank war episode, hoping that the series was leaning into the college shenanigans that it does well and not the deep Trek lore that it keeps handling so poorly. Unfortunately, this episode is a return to form in the worst possible way: the show wants to use this famous IP to tell sweeping stories of family, friendship, and diaspora, but they are doing so while running the franchise into the ground. Previously, I quoted Captain Kirk in reminding Paramount executives that “risk is part of the game” when it comes to this beloved brand’s storytelling.
I was hoping these creators might “boldly go” and do something that builds a future for the IP while honoring its past, all while quoting the franchise’s most famous character. Since these clearly hate The Original Series so much and clearly don’t care about the fandom, I figured I would send the same message using the cool, measured, and rational language that these millionaires might finally understand: “Making Star Trek is not for the chickensh*t!”
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Miller Kern is the Deputy Editor of Shopping and Reviews at Mashable, where she writes and edits reviews, roundups, deals, and news stories about tech products, including headphones, skincare devices, laptops, sex toys, e-readers, robot vacuums, and more. She’s been covering all things shopping and tech, including shopping holidays like Prime Day and Black Friday, for Mashable since 2019. Miller can tell you which products are actually worth your money. She also explores trends in the shopping sphere, such as dupes and viral TikTok moments.
Entertainment
Lost your job to AI? See the new sci-fi thriller Good Luck, Have Fun, Don’t Die for free.
If you’ve lost your job to AI, Briarcliff Entertainment wants to give you a gift: free tickets to see the highly anticipated sci-fi thriller Good Luck, Have Fun, Don’t Die. Because “Who better to see a film about AI’s impact than those already experiencing it firsthand?” as Tom Ortenberg, the company’s CEO, noted.
Directed by Gore Verbinski (Pirates of the Caribbean) and written by Matthew Robinson (The Invention of Lying), Good Luck, Have Fun, Don’t Die is set to hit cinemas Feb. 13. It stars Sam Rockwell as a man from the future who comes to warn of impending global doom from an AI apocalypse. It’s not too far off from reality, TBH. For some, the AI revolution hits a little too close to home, and Briarcliff Entertainment, in partnership with Fever, wanted to give those folks a little something special.
“If you or someone you know has been quietly replaced, sidelined, or optimized in the name of progress, tell us your story and receive a pair of tickets, on the house,” a letter on the movie’s social pages states.
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The first 1,000 folks to sign up will get two free tickets. Just head to the Fever promotional page, log in or sign up using your email or social accounts, and you’ll be directed to a checkout page where you can “Tell your story or share your LinkedIn” to secure the tickets. The promotional period ends on Sunday, Feb. 8, so you’ll want to act fast. If you’re within the first 1,000 signups, you’ll receive your coupon to get two free tickets within two days.
Credit: Briarcliff Entertainment
The movie doesn’t hit theaters until next week, but check out the trailer for a glimpse into the bonkers comedy. Good Luck, Have Fun, Don’t Die also stars Haley Lu Richardson, Michael Peña, Zazie Beetz, Asim Chaudhry, and Juno Temple.
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Entertainment
Starfleet Academy Narrowly Pulls Off Tribute To Star Trek's Greatest Captain, With Help From Dax
By Chris Snellgrove
| Published
Originally, the preview for the latest episode of Starfleet Academy had me quite nervous because it was clear the story would focus on Benjamin Sisko, the legendary captain of Deep Space Nine. DS9 remains my favorite Trek, but SFA’s writing has been so wildly inconsistent that I was scared the writers would do something to tarnish the legacy of this amazing show and its most powerful performer: Avery Brooks. To my surprise, Starfleet Academy offered a surprisingly sweet tribute to Sisko, though its nostalgic triumphs were nearly undermined by the show’s forced whimsy and clunky humor.
The framing device for this Starfleet Academy episode is that holographic character Series Acclimation Mil (SAM) is told by her people to enroll in a course about understanding the unknown. They figure this will help SAM with her mission, which is to understand humanity and ultimately decide whether they are ready to co-exist with a whole race of holograms. To get into this course so long after it’s started, though, SAM must impress its teacher by answering a centuries-old, seemingly impossible question: what happened to Benjamin Sisko, a man who either died in the fire caves of Bajor or is still living outside of corporeal time with the godlike prophets.
Sisko Did It For More Than The Uniform
While the presentation of SAM’s story is overwhelmingly, distractingly twee (more on this soon), the central question is a great hook for longtime fans. We’ve spent decades wanting to know more about Sisko’s fate, so it’s easy to get invested in this plucky hologram’s Quixotic quest to learn more about him. When it comes to delivering the goods (and beware some major spoilers from here on out!), Starfleet Academy finally shows that it knows the meaning of restraint.
You see, SAM doesn’t get any kind of definitive answer, which really relieved me. I was really scared the show would have Sisko return as some kind of AI monstrosity, or maybe awkwardly insert him into franchise lore by saying he left the Celestial Temple to end the Temporal Cold War or something equally contrived. Instead, SAM’s investigation mostly uncovers what Star Trek fans already knew: that Sisko was an amazing Starfleet officer, world-class father, and killer cook on top of reluctantly becoming space Jesus to an entire planet full of strange aliens.
More Than Jake
In this way, Starfleet Academy pulls off a fairly successful bait and switch, teasing an investigation into a beloved franchise character before settling into a nostalgic tribute. The tribute goes to some truly unexpected places, like having Lower Decks icon Tawny Newsome play the latest alien host of the Dax symbiote. The real show-stopping cameo, though, came from Cirroc Lofton returning as Jake Sisko, one who talks to SAM via an interactive hologram (or perhaps a Prophet-like vision) in Anslem, his first novel that he secretly completed but never published.
Lofton is as great as ever, and his presence helped cement that this was a sweet, loving tribute to a character made famous by Avery Brooks, who will never be coming back to the franchise. Brooks gets the last word via an older recording that the show passes off as narration from Benjamin Sisko. While that’s admittedly a little weird (hey, at least they got Brooks’ permission… probably), it served as a sentimental capper to a surprisingly deft, often-moving tribute to the coolest captain in Star Trek history.
When Star Trek Talks Down To Its Audience
While it gets the Sisko tribute just right, everything else about this Starfleet Academy episode remains a hot mess. The episode is all about SAM, and they lean into this with a prolonged opening where she talks to the camera while cartoony pop-ups helpfully label things (like “me” and “my makers”) for viewers. That might have been cute on paper, but by the time the show monosyllabically defined “emissary” as “big job,” I realized this was definitive proof (definitive=big deal!) that the writers think everyone watching is a complete idiot.
Speaking of complete idiocy, this Starfleet Academy episode is held back by a terrible subplot in which Chancellor Ake is helping Commander Kelrec prepare to host a visiting dignitary. They end up having a rehearsal dinner attended by the Doctor and Jett Reno, but things immediately go off the rails, with characters doing goofy banter and using table implements as ersatz loudspeakers. The 800-year-old Doctor inexplicably gives everyone spoons with holes in them, and all of this builds to everyone but Kelrec laughing at a deflating fish making farting noises (no, really).
Open Wide, Here Come The “Jokes”
This is part of Starfleet Academy’s overly broad humor that never really lands. It’s not like the show can’t do comedic writing: Caleb’s one-liners are often funny, and if you can get over all the vulgarity and 21st-century slang, the cadets’ constant teasing of each other will make you laugh more often than not. But the show often tries way too hard at comedy, as evidenced by the show’s digital dean (voiced by Stephen Colbert) using the term “morning wood” before laughing in delight at his own boner joke.
The broad humor reminded me of a grim irony: over a decade ago, the Star Trek podcast The Greatest Generation became a success because its hosts (Ben Harrison and Adam Pranica) embraced low-brow humor to talk about a franchise that other podcasters took deadly seriously. In their own words, they were the “d*ck and fart joke” Trek podcast, one made for fans who just wanted a few laughs rather than an in-depth discussion. For franchise fans looking for a consistent chuckle, this remains the best podcast in the entire quadrant.
Now, though, this latest Starfleet Academy episode has proven that this is the d*ck and fart Star Trek show, but these writers can never really land lowbrow humor the way Ben and Adam do. Plus, the constant influx of dirty jokes and foul language constantly cheapens the show’s attempts to discuss anything more serious. Like, ask yourself: is this Sisko episode stronger or weaker for having an awkward boner joke straight out of a Judd Apatow movie?
Go Home, Star Trek, You’re Drunk
It doesn’t help that Starfleet Academy is still trying to straddle the line between being a show concerned with Trek’s legacy (look, they just did a whole episode on The Sisko!) and a show that wants to channel every teen movie ever made. Like, SAM’s revelations about Sisko occur partially while she is blackout drunk at a bar, and her antics lead to a barfight between the Academy types and their rival cadets at the War College. This doesn’t really move the story forward (with the exception of accelerating Caleb and Tarima’s inevitable relationship), and it felt like the writers just wanted to check a few more tropes off a list.
Overall, this latest episode of Starfleet Academy is good, but not great: it lands almost shockingly well as a tribute to Sisko, and as a lifelong Deep Space Nine superfan, I found much of this (especially the cameo from Cirroc Lofton) genuinely moving. The episode also works well as an extended introduction to SAM, but her character development is held back by writers trying to make her a photonic pixie dream girl with the personal log aesthetic of a direct-to-video Nickelodeon film. Throw in the d*ck and fart jokes, and you’re left with a Star Trek show that still can’t figure out if its core audience is old-school fans or modern teens who inexplicably watch nothing but ‘80s boner comedies.
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