Entertainment
Iconic Superhero Movie Being Hidden From Streaming, Disney Doesn't Want You To Watch It
By Robert Scucci
| Published
Listen, I’m not the most reliable source when it comes to comic book movies, but I’ve seen most of them despite my lack of knowledge about the source material that inspires them. I once watched 34 MCU movies in just as many weeks on a dare after I said I loved the Fast and Furious movies but hated Marvel movies, which resulted in a long lecture about how I should love them because they’re basically the same thing. Letting my pride get the best of me, I watched every single movie that had been released up to that point, and it was alright. I wouldn’t do it again, but I think I get the gist by now.
That entire journey eventually led me to 2003’s Hulk, which I put off for years because it’s only available through on demand purchases. While I don’t have definitive proof as to why it’s not available on a streaming service except as a rental, I’m inclined to believe it has something to do with Disney’s stranglehold over all things Marvel related. Or maybe there’s just no demand for it. Either way, the point still stands that you have to throw down money to watch it, which is probably for the better, because this movie made some choices that genuinely baffle me.
Decisions Were Made
If you’re reading this article for a full rundown on all things Hulk related, I’m sorry to disappoint. What I’m here to talk about specifically is how much better the MCU handled the overall story. We all know that Bruce Banner (Eric Bana) turns big and green when he’s angry, and that General Thaddeus “Thunderbolt” Ross (Sam Elliott) has a complicated history with Bruce’s father, David Banner (Nick Nolte). That history forces Ross to intervene after a series of unsanctioned experiments lead to Bruce’s transformation.
Collateral damage is inevitable. Bruce falls in love with Betty Ross (Jennifer Connelly), the general’s daughter, and Ross repeatedly threatens to lock him up for “the rest of his natural life.” This is said several times throughout the film, even though there’s nothing remotely natural about any of it, making that recurring line make absolutely no sense.
I’m not a tights and flights guy. I haven’t seen the new DCU’s Superman. I tapped out of the MCU after The Marvels, and I’ll only return if we get more Deadpool and Wolverine action at some point. With that bias firmly established, I’m here to extend an olive branch and explain why 2003’s Hulk pales in comparison to 2008’s The Incredible Hulk.
Hulk’s biggest problem is pacing. We get the David Banner and Thunderbolt backstory. We learn about Bruce Banner’s repressed memories and identity issues. We’re subjected to all the usual junk science explaining how he becomes Hulk, along with explosions and extended emotional yammering about all of it. The movie runs 138 minutes, and we don’t even get to see Hulk doing Hulk stuff until more than 40 minutes in.
The film is trying to function as both an origin story and its subsequent adventures in one sitting, while also attempting to appeal to casual viewers and diehard comic book fans at the same time. That’s a tall order, and it never really works.
The MCU, on the other hand, does a much better job with worldbuilding. There are standalone origin films like Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk, Thor, and Captain America: The First Avenger. All of these build toward the first Avengers movie, which arrived in 2012. Every Avengers film hits harder because we don’t need drawn-out origin stories anymore. They already happened. In other words, we get Avengers doing Avengers stuff because we’re already in the know. Hulk tries to do too much at once and, in my mind, was doomed from the start to never be a fully satisfying film.
The Comic Book Panels Are Laughable
One thing that completely took me out of Hulk was the gratuitous use of picture overlap. Director Ang Lee was clearly going for a comic book panel look, showing multiple moments at once in a single frame, but it honestly resembles the kind of amateur editing I do when cutting podcast episodes.
There’s a scene that shows Nick Nolte’s face in one frame and his foot in another, just so we know his foot is up to something. I understand what they were trying to do, but I’m still baffled by the execution. It’s an uncomfortable visual experience that feels less like a stylistic choice and more like a PowerPoint presentation that’s been left on autoplay.
While Hulk does have some charm in its own cheesy way, I much prefer the MCU version because it’s part of a larger plan that eventually leads to a more satisfying payoff. As a standalone film, Hulk doesn’t have what it takes to be everything it wants to be. That said, it’s still an interesting watch if you’re trying to check another Marvel movie off your list.
As of this writing, you can purchase Hulk on demand through YouTube, Apple TV+, and Amazon Prime Video.
Entertainment
This $10 upgrade transforms your PC — but it’s only on sale until midnight
TL;DR: Upgrade a PC affordably with this Microsoft Windows 11 Pro license, on sale for just $9.97 (reg. $199) through tonight at midnight.
Want to get the feeling of a new computer without having to shell out all the money for one? A new operating system gives your device a whole new feel, and if you’ve got a PC lying around, it could probably use this Microsoft Windows 11 Pro upgrade. If you act fast, you can get it for only $9.97 through tonight at 11:59 p.m. PT.
Windows 11 Pro breathes new life into an old computer, extending its lifespan for less than the cost of your lunch. Unlike older operating systems, this one was made with the modern professional in mind.
Mashable Deals
Rest easy knowing Windows 11 Pro is filled with features that can improve your workflow — from an easy-to-use interface that enhances usability to snap layouts, seamless redocking, a more powerful search experience, and improved voice typing.
Take advantage of unique professional tools like Azure AD, Hyper-V, Windows Sandbox, and BitLocker device encryption. Then take a break and check out the impressive gaming experience offered by DirectX 12 Ultimate graphics.
Windows 11 Pro includes Copilot, Microsoft’s very own AI-powered assistant, which can assist you with a wide range of tasks. Get some help kickstarting your writing process, summarizing web pages, changing your settings, or even opening your apps.
You can also enjoy improved cybersecurity with Windows 11 Pro, as it adds biometric logins, encrypted authentication, and enhanced antivirus protection.
Mashable Deals
Get your PC a Microsoft Windows 11 Pro license for only $9.97 tonight through midnight.
StackSocial prices subject to change.
Entertainment
3 AdultFriendFinder red flags — how to avoid scams on AFF
Depending on who you ask, AdultFriendFinder is either the Wild West of hookup sites, an “anything goes” paradise for adult fun, or a total scam replete with bots, fake profiles, and inactive accounts.
After months of personal testing, I can confidently say which AFF you experience ultimately boils down to how you use the site. If you approach it naively, without a strategy, you’re probably going to have some frustrating experiences. On the other hand, if you exercise a modicum of caution and common sense, you’ll discover a huge, fun, and kink-friendly community.
Here are three red flags to look out for as you use AFF, to help you spot potential scammers and separate the authentic users from the fake profiles.
Hookup apps for everyone
AdultFriendFinder
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readers’ pick for casual connections
Tinder
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top pick for finding hookups
Hinge
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popular choice for regular meetups
Credit: AdultFriendFinder
Unverified accounts
AdultFriendFinder already offers a fantastic first step in combatting fake profiles that they call ConfirmID. Once you’ve created an account, you can, at any time, upload a clear scan of a government-issued ID card and then, using a webcam, undergo a quick face verification scan to confirm that you are indeed the person identified in the government document.
This step strikes the perfect balance between not being onerous enough to annoy the average user but still requiring enough effort to deter scammers, who notoriously go after the low-hanging fruit.
Mashable Trend Report
Once you’ve completed the ConfirmID sequence, you’ll be rewarded with a verification badge on your profile, and we strongly recommend that you limit your one-on-one interactions on the site to other verified users.
Perfect profile photos
Alright, admittedly this one requires some personal judgment, as everyone should strive to upload good, high-quality photos of themselves to dating websites. But if every photo looks like it belongs in a magazine, or if the person in the photo looks a little too good to be true, you should exercise caution.
In the age of generative AI and filters, it’s trivially easy to create a fake photo or series of photos, so you should also be on the lookout for what isn’t in the photos. Are there recognizable local landmarks (clubs, restaurants, well-known parks, or street corners) in the photos, or are they all equally generic?
Over-eager chatters
Ever since chat bots became a thing, dating sites have become plagued with them, and as AI improves more and more, it’s not always easy to know, right away, if the “person” you’re talking to is really human. One dead giveaway, though, is how much they chat and how quickly they reply.
Real people go off on tangents, employ non sequiturs, and sometimes stumble with awkward questions or comments. Chat bots, on the other hand, are typically always chipper and extremely fast-talking, so much so that a paragraph-long answer can come back to you in seconds.
They also almost always have an agenda, too, whether that’s directing you to click on a link (“Follow my Instagram profile”) or getting you to divulge some potentially compromising bit of personal information about yourself.
Entertainment
SNL opens with another Pete Hegseth press conference
Saturday Night Live returned from a brief hiatus Saturday with a cold open depicting a joint press conference between Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth and FBI Director Kash Patel, with “Master of None” creator Aziz Ansari playing the latter.
Colin Jost’s Hegseth hit the familiar beats at the podium — performative machismo, military bravado, and repeated jabs at the secretary’s well-documented drinking habits. This time, Hegseth arrived at the mic hauling an oversized pitcher of scotch, which he assured the room was his one for the day. He then fielded questions from the press about the administration’s handling of U.S. strikes on Iran, dismissing each reporter with the particular brand of smug confidence that has become central to Jost’s portrayal of the character.
Ansari’s Patel proved to be the sketch’s standout, arriving to defend his tenure at the FBI and proceeding to do so poorly. The bit’s centerpiece involved Patel simultaneously denying and admitting that he had locked himself out of his work email for 36 hours after forgetting he had changed his password to “kashmeoutside69.”
Funnily enough, Patel was reportedly locked out of his FBI email in real life and believed, at least momentarily, that he was being fired. As the sketch demonstrated, the distance between SNL’s Cold Open and the actual news cycle has rarely felt smaller.
This $10 upgrade transforms your PC — but it’s only on sale until midnight
Wild D Jonas Brodin out for Game 1, F Joel Eriksson Ek also ailing
