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Stargate Cast Goes Off On The Dumbest Part Of The Series And Every Fan Agrees

By Jonathan Klotz
| Published

Stargate SG-1 turned an early-90s Roland Emmerich film into the foundation for a franchise that’s lasted 30 years and counting. One of the best additions to the franchise came with the villainous Goa’uld symbiotes, who can live for thousands of years and thoroughly enjoy enslaving others to do their bidding.

The problem is that the Goa’uld also use advanced energy weapons, including the Zat’nik’tel, a handheld “ray gun” with capabilities that make no sense the moment you put any thought into them. Michael Shanks, who played Dr. Daniel Jackson, thinks they are the dumbest weapons ever made, and during Oz-Comic Con in 2015, he unleashed decades of resentment in an amazing tirade explaining why the “Zat Gun” was stupid. 

The Zat’nik’tel Is The Dumbest Weapon In Sci-Fi

While on stage with Ben Browder (Colonel Cameron Mitchell in Seasons 9-10, and also the lead from Farscape) and Cliff Simon (Ba’al the Goa’uld System Lord), Michael Shanks takes an innocent fan’s question about why the SGC team uses P-90s as a sidearm instead of the far more powerful Zat Gun. Shanks starts off slowly, explaining he refused to ever carry a Zat’nik’tel because “it’s the dumbest weapon ever invented by sci-fi.” 

For five more minutes, Shanks goes off on everything wrong with the Zat’nik’tel, from its phallic shape to the barely noticeable physical firing effect, before zeroing in on the very stupid way that the weapon works. The first shot from a Zat’nik’tel stuns the target, the second typically kills, and the third causes them to disintegrate. At first, that sounds pretty badass, but as Michael Shanks points out, it makes no sense. 

Michael Shanks goes off on Zat guns.

Shanks argues that if you shoot a lock like O’Neil did, is the lock stunned? Then why did it break open?  How long is too long between shots? Can you shoot someone an hour later? Does that stun, or does that count as the second shot? And after stunning them three times, shouldn’t they disappear because that’s three shots? 

The Zat’nik’tel makes no sense in Stargate SG-1, a show where, again, the big villains are evil, nearly immortal symbiotes. While Shanks is ranting, Ben Browder and Cliff Simon are cackling along with him, having experienced the inconsistent rules around the Zat Gun firsthand. Shanks points out that the third shot that disintegrated was created on the spot as a solution to the pile of bodies the SGC team was leaving behind while infiltrating a spaceship. There was no grand plan; it was an attempt to fill a plothole with a larger pothole. 

No Sci-Fi Franchise Is Perfect

Every sci-fi franchise has parts about it that make no sense, and Stargate is no exception. What’s refreshing is Michael Shanks willingness to have fun with the audience about exactly why he despises the Zat’nik’tel, and again, everyone who’s been in a sci-fi franchise can relate. Star Wars gave fans midichlorians, Star Trek’s timeline drives fans crazy, and Battlestar Galactica revealed the identity of The Five. None of those are as ultimately inconsequential as the Zat’nik’tel, which is what makes Shanks exasperated rant so over the top: it’s the equivalent of Jonathan Frakes talking about how a phaser works. 

Stargate SG-1 fans have known for years that the Zat’nik’tel is a very dumb weapon. As part of its first-anniversary episode, “Wormhole X-Treme,” the crew even got to make fun of the Zat’nik’tel by having it described with a completely straight face, followed by the response, “That’s stupid.” It is, and it’s refreshing when the people making the series acknowledge that, yeah, they messed up when creating this, but at least they can laugh about it. 

Compared to Star Wars and Star Trek, Stargate doesn’t have the name recognition or the same sort of cultural impact, though all that may change, and we may get an updated Zat’nik’tel when the new Amazon series debuts in a few years. In the meantime, there’s plenty of time to binge all 10 seasons of Stargate SG-1 and engage in the fun of discussing why every single planet in the galaxy looks like Vancouver. 


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A Fully Loaded Potato Salad for Dinner

nicoise potato salad

I love potato salad. I love the creamy kind, the vinegar-y kind; I’ll take a warm one with dill, whatever you’ve got. And yet, I’m about to make a bold claim: this potato salad might be my favorite. Why? Because it’s decidedly not a side dish. It’s the whole damn meal.

This recipe comes to us from Melina Hammer, who calls it a “Niçoise-ish” potato salad, because it’s souped up with tuna, eggs, and other classic Niçoise elements. “You get those bright, bold flavors,” says Melina. It adapts easily for the season, she adds, suggesting winter radishes — like purple daikons or watermelon radishes — if you make it this month. “You can also swap the green beans for two cups of chopped escarole or Napa cabbage, and I’m always a fan of thawed frozen peas. No need to cook them any further — just toss ’em in!”

Here’s the full recipe, plus some pointers from Melina:

Niçoise-ish Potato Salad
by Melina Hammer
Serves 4

3 eggs
salt
1 dry quart small red potatoes (approximately 2 lbs), any larger ones sliced in half
1/3 cup extra virgin olive oil
1 tbsp Dijon mustard
1/4 tsp (or more) freshly ground black pepper
2 tbsp capers, strained
2 1/2 oz thin green beans, stem ends trimmed and sliced into 1 1/2-2 inch segments on a diagonal (or swap for peas, cabbage, etc)
1 5-ounce can albacore tuna
3 radishes, ends trimmed and sliced in halves, then thinly sliced
2 tbsp finely sliced chives
2 tsp freshly squeezed lemon juice

Bring a medium saucepan with enough water to cover the eggs by an inch to a boil. Lower refrigerator-cold eggs into the water and cook them on a simmer for 8 minutes, then plunge the eggs into an ice bath until they are cool enough to handle. Peel and then slice the eggs into six wedges apiece and set aside.

Bring the potatoes to a simmer in well-salted water. Cook for 8 minutes or until they yield easily when pierced with a sharp knife. Strain them into a colander with a slotted spoon, reserving the cooking liquid. Transfer the potatoes to a mixing bowl and add the oil, mustard, black pepper, and capers. Gently toss to fully coat.

Blanch the green beans in the potato water for 30 seconds to 1 minute — just long enough for them to turn bright green. Strain, and add to the potatoes. Add the tuna, flaking the fish into the bowl, followed by the radishes and chives. Toss to incorporate, then add the eggs and lemon juice. (Note: “If you’re making this a day or more in advance, hold the lemon juice and add it just before serving,” says Melina. “Otherwise, it will dull the color of the green beans.”) Gently toss once more. “I like to use a silicone spatula and work up from the bottom of the bowl, folding the ingredients together with a light hand so the yolks remain mostly intact.”

As you serve the potato salad, make sure to scoop up all the last bits of custardy egg, straggler chives, and mustardy goodness clinging to the sides of the bowl. Enjoy.

nicoise potato salad

Melina Hammer is a chef, food stylist, recipe developer, and the award-winning author of A Year at Catbird Cottage. Her recipes have appeared on Bon Appétit, Food52, and Edible. You can follow her newsletter, Stories from Catbird Cottage.

What other dinner salads do you love? And do you have a house salad?

P.S. Five ways to upgrade a regular green salad, and white bean soup, because it’s February.

(Photos courtesy of Melina Hammer.)

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Streaming deal alert: Get 3 months of MUBI for only $1

SAVE $43.97: Through Feb. 9, new and returning subscribers can get three months of streaming on MUBI for only $1. Usually $14.99 per month, that’s nearly $44 in savings.


If you’re looking to venture away from Netflix and its extravagant costs, MUBI is an excellent choice — especially if you’re a movie lover. There are never any ads, it’s brimming with hand-picked quality cinema, and for a limited time, it’s just a buck.

Through Feb. 9, new and returning subscribers can get three months of streaming on MUBI for just $1. It typically costs $14.99 per month (or $9.99 per month with an annual membership), which means you’ll save nearly $44 total across 90 days. After the promotional period, of course, the price will jump back up to $14.99 unless you cancel first.

MUBI is made for cinephiles, as it prides itself as a place to “discover ambitious films and series by visionary filmmakers — from iconic directors to emerging auteurs.” You’ll find mainstream and independent films, classics and new releases, award winners, and even Mubi originals. That includes one of our favorite movies from 2025, Die My Love, and one of our favorites from 2024, The Substance. It’s also where you can watch Lili Reinhart‘s new show Hal & Harper, as well as Twin Peaks in its entirety.

Streaming deals this good don’t stick around long — be sure to secure your $1 subscription by Feb. 9.

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The Series That Scarred 80s Kids Forever

By Jonathan Klotz
| Published

Every child of the ’80s carries with them scars to this day. We watched Artax lose the will to live in the Swamp of Sorrow, half the Autobots blown up in the first 10 minutes of Transformers: The Movie, and Punky Brewster turning refrigerators into the scariest household appliance. Even the original 1983 G.I. Joe got in on the action with surprisingly dark episodes, including one in which a traitor is consumed by piranhas, but none hit as hard as “There’s No Place Like Springfield,” a two-part psychological horror focused on breaking Shipwreck, a fan favorite character, so that he’d give up the secret formula that turns water into an explosive. Cobra never did anything the way, so the master plan was to pay homage to the mind-bending sci-fi series The Prisoner

G.I. Joe’s Psychological Horror Season Finale

After the required bumper saying “G.I. Joe will return after these messages,” Shipwreck wakes up in a hospital and learns that his family was concerned about him. Not Uncle Al, but his wife (Mara, the Cobra operative spliced with fish DNA who previously fell in love with Shipwreck) and daughter, which is news to the career soldier who had given up on ever having a normal life. Haunted by nightmares, Shipwreck nonetheless falls into a routine with the family he always wanted in the idyllic town of Springfield. 

The two-part episode is the equivalent of a slow-burning episode for G.I. Joe, which normally wrapped up the entire story in 22-minutes with a massive gun battle. “There’s No Place Like Springfield” slowly peels back the curtain as Shipwreck realizes there’s something wrong with the town, and he uncovers the Cobra conspiracy behind it all. With the town burning down around him when the Joes arrive on a rescue mission, Shipwreck is confronted by Mara, the woman he loves, who’s still fighting for Cobra, and his daughter, armed with a rocket launcher.. Until they melt into goo. 

G.I. Joe was a very light-hearted children’s show designed to sell toys, which is why the sheer anguish in Shipwreck’s voice when he realizes that his family were synthoids is so haunting. He knows he’s been lied to by Cobra, he knows everything is fake, but in those final moments, he’s still hoping that it could be real. A glorified commercial wasn’t supposed to include deep themes about life, love, and trauma. All it needed was for the loved ones of a fan favorite character to start melting as he helplessly looked on. 

G.I. Joe’s Best Episode

“There’s No Place Like Springfield” clearly took cues from Patrick McGoohan’s psychological sci-fi drama by dropping the hero in the middle of a perfect town, where other residents use various methods, both overt and covert, to get information from him. Shipwreck’s house is also located at 6 Village Drive, an obvious homage to Number Six and The Village from The Prisoner. As a kid, it’s easy to miss references to a show from the 60s, even the large, white, gelatinous mass that attacks Shipwreck is a direct reference to The Village’s bouncy, balloon security device, Rover. All the kids cared about was that Shipwreck made it out alive. 

G.I. Joe ended Season 1 with the two-part psychological horror, but when Season 2 came around a year later, Shipwreck wasn’t shown dealing with the trauma; instead, he was reduced to comic relief. The addition of Sgt. Slaughter in Season 2 forced Season 1’s fan favorites to get less of the spotlight, but of all of them, Shipwreck deserved to remain a featured player, and he deserved to eventually settle down with the real Mara. 

Melting loved ones turned “There’s No Place Like Springfield” into a memorable G.I. Joe episode that’s remained at the top of fan favorite lists for decades. 80s kids were used to horrible, horrible things happening to their heroes ever since we watched E.T. get sick. There had to be a better way to introduce new toys than to kill off the old favorites.   

If you want to relive the 80s or check it out for the first time, G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero is currently streaming for free on Pluto TV.


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